I was Clint Eastwood at the Oscars

Last night, I had a dream. (Very not like MLK Jr.). In the dream, I was Clint Eastwood. I was at the Oscars. (Keep in mind, I did not watch the Oscars this year). I was feeling sad, because I was Clint Eastwood and I was old and I wasn’t going to win anything this year. But I was standing on the stage, anyway, looking out at the audience, and Martin Scorcese was next to me. And there was a young guy with long, curling black hair, and he was the winner of something, and he was giving a speech (reflection makes me think that this may have been Peter Jackson, but in the dream it looked more like Weird Al Yankovic). The young guy turned and started talking about Scorcese and how he’d always been his hero and how he’d been thinking he should thank him, and I, Clint Eastwood, was feeling really bad about this, sad and kind of washed up, and then the kid turned suddenly and said, “But this guy, I mean, with this guy I got the chance for ‘Jaws.'” And everyone applauded, and I was surprised and pleased. I thought, I didn’t know Clint Eastwood did Jaws, and I was somehow still Clint Eastwood as I thought this.

Anyway, then the young guy rushed into the crowd and so did I, running down the aisle, and everyone was still cheering. I was very tall and felt good, in my tuxedo. Very dashing. And there was a whole row of seats open in which there was only one woman, who looked like Mandy Moore, dressed in a flowy purple dress (the best I can describe it: it was the dress Marilyn Monroe was wearing in her famous street-grate picture, only a beautiful almost mauvish purple). I said, “Mary Martin! I’ve loved you since you were Peter Pan!” And she said she loved me too. It became clear, in that moment, that Mary Martin and I, Clint Eastwood, were going to get together and be happy. And everyone was happy for us. The end.

It was a spectacular dream. It happened during my last hour or so of sleep — I woke up at about 7:20 and saw it was 7:20 and went back to sleep, and this is what I got. It stuck with me all day. I had this strange feeling of euphoria for most of the morning, because I was Clint Eastwood at the Oscars and I got the girl in the end.

Think of a better way for your day to start than that.

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5 Responses to I was Clint Eastwood at the Oscars

  1. therealjae says:

    This is a great post. 🙂

    -J

  2. tangleofthorns says:

    That is truly the coolest dream I’ve ever heard of. Damn. Even as a Scorsese partisan (“partisan” is such a weird word there for me, because now I’m picturing us hiding out in the Hollywood hills planning ambushes and waiting for communiqués from Joe Pesci), that made me want to hug Clint Eastwood.

  3. kepkanation says:

    It was a great dream!

  4. kepkanation says:

    I know, I’ve never really had Clint Eastwood sympathies before, but now…

  5. simplelyric says:

    Hee. That does sound awesome.

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