Right now, I would vote for any candidate who would come and rake my lawn. I did the front today, so it’s not even that hard. Maybe not national candidate, OK, but local, possibly even House race — you bet. If the Pacific Green Party candidate was in my backyard tomorrow with a rake and some of those plastic lawn bags that look like pumpkins, I would totally change my vote. I would go to the office at 10th and Lincoln, get a new ballot, and vote for that guy. But I know he’s a chemist by trade, so he probably has other stuff to do. (I’d extend the same invite to the Constitution Party candidate, but she was endorsed by the Oregon Firearms Federation, and something about that makes me afraid to find her in my backyard).
I would probably also make anyone who decided to trade lawn work for votes some bad coffee. If it was a job really well done, or if it was Congressman DeFazio, I might break out the Starbucks beans and my new coffee grinder, but I feel there’s a high chance that my ineptitude with that little gadget might end up embarrassing us both. (Also I used it to grind cumin seeds recently). One of my major questions in electing a candidate: Can she or he operate a coffee grinder better than I can?1
I’m just about done with election season. That’s the summary, here.
1 That is not true.